Band practice (teenagers)

I'm on my laptop at the desk of one of the siblings of the bass player in my son's teenage rock pop band. There are kids in the kitchen, and the lounge is set up with a variety of toys, board games, nurturing routines, one of the siblings (I can't tell them apart) has written a letter in pencil handwriting, all code. The Mum has baked brownies, iced them, there's snacks aplenty. 

The older kids started band practice after one of the younger siblings finished rehearsing with a five piece, boys and girls in the band, a school performance in two weeks, very nervous, but sound great to me. A musical household and a family home, nice. 

I'd been so exhausted, too exhausted, and checked into an Airbnb for 2 night's sleep by the beachside in an art deco apartment, followed by 3 nights this week in a cool one-bedroom artists retreat, both different but welcome experiences, each with a bath. The latter had an outdoor bath, and I think that's my future goal, if I can tolerate bathing in ear shot of neighbours, it's very relaxing, whereas my indoor bath is in a room needs a makeover, repaint, retiling and is not so cool. 

Playing around with furniture and rugs and comfortable chairs and making spaces cosy, is fun. Whilst I was in Goodwood I asked M if he'd stop by after work, he's still married to the job which meant I got to keep him until about 8, talking and talking about strategy, I hope he goes further and higher and has more influence and interestingly we talked about this later, of not generalising so much and trying to do everything and having a filter, that just because either of us, hypothetically could become an expert on topic X, we don't need to, we need to let someone else be that expert and stick to our talent and know when to handover. I understand his obsession, we have the same brain and sense of justice, ironically he is more zen, but I'm the part timer. I miss him a lot, he made me want to go to work every day, I need to another M, preferably left-handed and left field, creative with a sense of discipline. As my neighbour said, of a highly admired leader, people like that get jealous of people like us, who can make art, they think it looks easy, and we're not doing much, but then they try it and feel out of control.

M asked me to guess demographic statistics, and I got it all correct, but I realised I'd exited before the work got boring, and I need to stay with work that continues to entertain me. I am as obsessive as him. 

He also does this thing and he starts off all cheery and officially friendly, but surface level, then he gets into his topic and his strategy brain ticks over, but in a nice way, and then time is up and he goes back into surface level. Because he's always generally so cheerful and kind, I hadn't realised that there are times when he's distant because other matters are on his mind. I admired his neighbourhood and he talked through the things I'd already appreciated-the pool, the tennis courts, the local football club, the french patisserie, the local library where I spoke to his brother for the last time, long ago, shortly before he stopped talking to me because I'd 'broken his heart', the Japanese noodle bar that is my dream. As I'd noticed before, the neighbourhood has a demographic similar to South Hobart, quite a density of well educated parents, but not spooners, never spooners, more people into rain water and recycling. It's a shame M didn't invest in his own place when he was a high earning CoS, but I can see that he spent his time helping other people, including his boss and friend, and his significant other, and his ageing parents (who have 4 other children) but he didn't prioritise a permanent home. He'll be fine, but it's an anomaly. 

I had an intriguing experience, came across a familiar name, who I realised was married to a long ago acquaintance, who is a researcher in paediatrics, she's worked hard; then came across a long ago class mate, who worked her way from speechie to senior project officer to director level, doing work I admire, because it's consumer engagement. We had a professional chat, I asked her what she's looking for, "a holiday", but was impressed because she'd achieved what she had, whilst staying true to her values, and principles, had an absolute vision for how we should do co-design, plus her work is well written and she gets people on board, can share the stage. As I said to her in our online chat, it's what you do when you grow up in the country. The last I knew of her she was doing a hospitality traineeship, she'd gone 'professional/middle class' later, and importance of slowing down. 

My studies are challenging, I had to take leave to recuperate from IT system failures, that impacted both work and assignments, and I failed my second assignment more badly than the first. Logic tells me that it's just a thing and not indicate of anything other than over work, but it's also confidence shattering, especially when I am a good writer and have prior experience, on the other hand, I'd been given a very tough second assignment, which required specialist knowledge, and only 3 weeks of online lectures to prepare me for content that only a person with clinical experience would understand properly. Hmmm. Slow down, I always do better. For my other subject, which is a community placement, I feel more at home with the crowd, whether my age or younger, there's a better understanding of work wellbeing, diverse experience, and my written messages are thoughtful and hit the mark. Good leadership.